Heather Gray

Are you tired of your own BS? Sick of yourself? Tired of looking at your life and thinking “Not This?”

Not this body. Not this relationship. Not this job.

Not this much hard.

You’ve been trapped on that merry go round, circling your options and finding none. You know you don’t want to take a wrecking ball to your life but you have no freaking clue what you’re supposed to do instead..

What if you could get off the ride, find your footing, and take those first steps toward your “Say Yes” life? No wrecking ball required.

Introducing From Not This to Yes!
A 7 day commitment to move away from what no longer works and go after what you really need.

Move away from Not This to Yes without analysis paralysis or falling down the rabbit hole of all your feelings and failings. In 7 days, you can get clear, get a plan, and get on with it.

You might be hearing yourself say Not This to any number of things:


Not this much exhaustion


Not this much giving without receiving


Not saying yes when I really want to say no


Not this parenting approach


Not this size


Not this much compromise


Not this much disrespect, conflict, or tension


Not this hopeless


Not this city or town


Not this family dynamic


Not this much censoring of what I really think, feel, or who I really am


Not this financial stress

Have you grown tired of hearing yourself talk about the same thing over and over?

Stopped answering your friends honestly when they ask how you are because your answers never change?

What if you could get yourself out of that corner you’ve painted yourself into?

That’s exactly why I created

From Not This to Yes!

You probably believe that if something isn’t working, you just have to blow it up, let the pieces fall where they may, and rebuild. If pulling that trigger isn’t that easy or you get overwhelmed by the fears and feelings that come up, you’re told that you’re the problem and that you’re getting in your own way.

You’re not the problem. There’s an easier way. You can get clear of what isn’t working and learn the movement required for change… and you don’t need to be in therapy forever to get there. You can do it, yourself, simply by making a 7 day commitment to learning new steps and taking new actions.


“We don’t get overwhelmed when we don’t know what to do. We get overwhelmed when we don’t know what to do next.”

– Matthew Kimberley

From Not This to Yes! Helps you ditch the overwhelm by guiding you step by step through the process of making significant change in your life.

Each day will start with a lesson offering information, talking points, and next steps. You can grab those lessons on your favorite podcast app through a private feed just for course members or watch the video presentation if video is more your style.

You will:

Get clear on what isn’t working (it may not be what you think it is!)

Identify and break down next steps into less intimidating pieces

Learn how to say hard things without diminishing your truth

Learn to do hard things without freezing, running away, or leaving a path of wreckage in your wake

After listening and learning, your program journal will guide you through the specific things you need to be thinking about, considering, and planning next:

You’ll look at the path in front of you instead of focusing on retelling old history and old stories or getting caught in analysis paralysis

We’ll chart your course before you make your first move

You stay in control. You say when.
You say where. You say how much.

You’re not getting bulldozed. You’re being led.

I know what you’re thinking…

If it was your decisions that got you to this place, how can you trust yourself to get out? Besides, it wasn’t anyone’s fault that you chose this and now some people might be hurt or directly affected by the changes you intend to make.

Not to mention, life is hard right now. It sucks. It feels selfish to think about change at a time when everyone is hurting around you. How can it be the right time to make a change when the world is so noisy and so many things are calling for your attention?

Here’s the thing… you’re carrying this weight around you wherever you go. As you try to be the best partner, parent, friend, worker, person you can be — you’re being weighed down by this pile of hard.

By learning to drop the weight, you are not only becoming better for yourself but you’re able to be better for everyone who needs you, cares about you, and benefits from your existence. You have to do this for yourself. It’s the only way it works but that doesn’t mean others won’t benefit from your hard work and commitment.

What might it be like if you looked at your life and were able to find your breath? How might things change if you were in a life that you didn’t want to run away from? What else might you be capable of?

Hi, I’m Heather.

I’m a clinically trained coach with 20 years of experience. I help people build lives they don’t want to run away from. Back in 2013, I read Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Not This”. At the time, I owned a brick and mortar private therapy practice but I was living with career ending burnout. It’s hard to run a successful business when you are decreasing your working hours and endlessly hoping for cancellations.

I stared Not This in the eyes and in a painstaking process, closed my business, moved away from offering therapy, and began to use my experience to coach people through making changes without drama, fight or flight, or endless processing. I help clients get clear and then I help them get moving.

I am looking forward to helping you, too. Because I said Not This first, I can now help you Say YES!

The Nitty Gritty

How From Not This Moves You to YES!


We’re Setting the Stage or the Table

We’re getting clear on your Not This, why it isn’t working, how living with it is impacting you, and we’re making a commitment to changing it to something that leads to YES!


Getting Right with Yourself

You got yourself here. Learn how to forgive yourself and make peace with yourself so you can get yourself out.


Setting You Up for Success

I know this isn’t your first rodeo. I know you have read the books, listened to the podcasts, and browsed the TED Talks. They’ve inspired you. They’ve motivated you, but they haven’t ever really helped you figure out what you need to do or how you need to do it so that you can finally be successful and on your way to peace. We figure out the nuts and bolts of what you need here.


Navigating You Away From Not This with Your Personal GPS

We spent the first few days breaking it down, getting clear, and getting closer to knowing how we want to be on the other side of this pile of hard. Now we’re charting the path with your considerations, non-negotiables, and desires informing the process.


The Boundaries Conversation

You knew that was coming, right? You can’t make a change before you know where you end and they begin. This is often the point where people freeze in making changes, talk themselves out of it, or otherwise bail. Like I said. Not your first rodeo. We’re getting you clear on your boundaries without vomiting in your mouth or peeing your pants.


You Can Say Hard Things.

If boundaries haven’t had you running for the hills in your previous attempts for change, odds are it’s been the talking about it that has left you fearful, anxious, or intimidated. How do you disappoint someone? Break their heart? What words do you say when no matter how you say it, the person listening will be profoundly affected? That’s what we get into here… finding the words for the hard conversations.


You Can Do Hard Things.

You know what isn’t working and why. You know the path you need to set. You know how others will need to shift and move accordingly. You’re clear on the words you need to say. Now this when you do the darned thing because yes, with guidance and a well intentioned plan, you can do hard things.


How does this work?

Once you purchase, you will be given a link to the course content. You will have two choices for how you learn the lessons: You can listen to the audio via a private podcast feed available right in your favorite podcast app or you can watch the video training. The course is accompanied by a downloadable workbook that you can print for yourself or complete on your screen.

How can this really help me?

You already know you need to make a change and odds are, you are already fairly sure about what isn’t working and why. You just don’t know what to do next because all you see in front of you is a pile of hard and intimidating things. Some people are the wrecking ball type but that isn’t you but you’re getting lost in the feelings, fears of how others will be affected, and in the many decisions that come with big change. I’ve helped hundreds of people through big changes. I know how to quiet the noise, simplify the process, and remove the distractions. You are getting overwhelmed, stuck and frozen because you don’t know what to do next. I do and I can show you in bite sized, manageable pieces that allow you to control the pace and maintain control. No wrecking ball required.

Really? Seven Days?

Yes. Really. You’ve been sitting with this chronic unhappiness for so long that you can’t see your way around it. But working with me, you’ll learn the process, identify the steps, and chart the course. You can get to YES in 7 days or you can chart the course in 7 days and get there on a timeline of your choosing. Remember. You say when. You say where. You say how much.

I process slow. How long do I have?

This is a not a use it or lose it scenario. You have all the time you need with lifetime access to the course material.

Do I get access to you or a community of others going through this?

Not this time. If talking about this to others or analysis paralysis worked for this, you’d be at your place of YES by now. Talking about it with others will only take you down the rabbit hole. Change like this is an inside job. That’s why it’s a private, self-study course. If this does open a whole can of worms and you need my 1:1 help, you can always reach out. I offer half day intensives for those who need additional support to get out of their own way. However, this course is comprehensive. It’s all laid out for you. You just need to lean in, accept my guidance, and say yes to yourself so you can have a Say Yes Life.

What's the refund policy?

Due to the digital nature of this course, there will be no refunds after purchase.

Who is This For?


If you’re the personal development junkie who’s read the books, listened to the podcasts, and watched the TED Talks but still find yourself in the same place, it’s time for a more active approach. You can’t just be motivated and inspired to change when the destination is unclear and the steps are undefined. You know you are ready to make a move. You just need a trained, experienced professional to tell you what you need to do.


You’ve known for a while that change is necessary. You might even know what needs to change but every time you think about saying it out loud, you are frozen and stuck in fear. So, you swallow your truth and try to forget about it until it rears its ugly head again. You know you need to say something but you have no clue what or how.


Maybe you even know what to say and how to say it but the idea of hurting people you love and care about in the process keeps you in the same place. You need a way out that respects everyone in the process.


You’re a therapy dropout. You’re tired of talking about it and of processing it endlessly. You know what you think. You know what you feel. You just don’t know what to do. You want it broken down and to be told “First, do this. Ok now, next, do this…”


You’re sick and tired of being sick and tired and you’re ready to throw your hat in the ring to try something new.

Who This Won’t Work For


You’re one to buy the books but don’t even bother reading them.


Your mind is already made up and you know you aren’t going to change, even though you want to.


You need feedback on every step of the process.


You are currently experiencing a mental health crisis or are grappling with unresolved trauma. I would encourage you to seek the 1:1 support of a trained professional for this.

Imagine what it could be like if…

Your friend called and you were able to say “I finally figured it out. I know what I need to do and I have a plan”.

You were free of the burden and the weight that comes with silence. Your truth was out there and you weren’t hiding from it or running from it. You were dealing with it and you were ok.

You could look yourself in the mirror and smile because you had finally done it. You finally made the change. You said the hard thing. You did the hard thing. You stayed true to yourself and went after the life you really wanted.

From Not This to Yes!
A 7 day commitment to move away from what no longer works and go after what you really need.